It's amazing, we're finally being allowed to talk about "It" without being labelled a you-know-what . . .

The conspiracy of silence . . . It's a scandal, really, isn't it?

Everyone is finally having to face up to the problem.

Thanks to UKIP. 

And about time!

Well — and it's about to get even worse.

Don't we know it!

Now we're going to get the Romanians battering on our door. And the . . . What-nots . . . Jordanians.

No need to batter, Suky. They can walk right in. Waltz right in, I should say. Go directly to the dole office. Do Not Pass Go.

But do collect £200! HAHAHA! No questions asked! Just hold out a mucky paw and say, I'll have some of that Free British Doshskii if you please. Very funny, Tessa!

I wish it was, Suky. I wish it was . . . And I'm not saying anything about Jordanians per se —

Aren't you? I am.

Well, all right. I am, actually.

Of course you are, darling. Don't be feeble. They're a dreadful bunch and you know it.

Well, no — I'm not saying that. Because that really is racist.

He-llo? It's only me! I'm not working for the Secret Police, you know! You can actually still say what you think in some corners of this so-called country. Without getting arrested . . . 

All right. I'm just saying — I've got nothing against the Eastern Europeans.

Far from it.