Several parliamentary sketch writers evidently had an amusing day watching Peter Mandelson do his stage villian turned saviour act at Brighton in front of a puce-pink backdrop. On the clips I watched on TV Mandelson looked incredibly wooden, with a delivery that was hammy and halting by turns.

This sort of diversion seems to entertain a lot media folk, along with the boring matter of the runners and riders to replace one unelected prime minister with another. The only salient words I can summon up about Mandelson are Deripaska, Job, Eight Months time. That's why he seems so de-mob happy on the stage at Brighton, because he won't have to appear there again.