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Mock the Nation
September 2009

Even by the standards of Mock the Week, the joke is feeble, barely a joke at all, but the potentially bathetic moment is saved by Lucy Porter, one of the few comediennes to appear on Mock the Week. "I'm doing it next week and what I really don't want to be thinking is, ‘Oh what's Frankie Boyle doing right now?'" she says.

When the testosterone is flowing, the worst thing a woman can do is try to be one of the boys. "Well it's a safe bet Lucy," Boyle snaps. "To be honest, even if I'm not watching it's just that time of day."  

The audience cheers. Boyle knows that the BBC's managers will not complain about a male guest telling a woman that he will be masturbating next time she is on television. The Newsnight presenter Emily Maitlis established her superiors' indifference when she confronted the BBC's director-general with a Boyle line last year. O' Briain had asked the panel to come up with "things the Queen would never say during her Christmas speech," and Boyle replied, "I'm now so old my pussy is haunted."  

Mark Thompson would not condemn him, waffling to Maitlis that he could "only judge in the context of the programme". If he watched the whole programme, perhaps he would realise that Mock the Week feeds on resentment. Pornography has many consequences, but the clearest is to increase male resentment of women who, apparently, are giving sex freely to everyone except those numb, hollow-eyed masturbators staring at them on their screens.

The show has also worked out that there is market in appealing to resentment of the elderly, which is growing as the population ages and the costs of looking after them become ever steeper. It targets them with an affectionless frequency that I have never seen before.

Here is Boyle again, responding to a question about the BBC's decision to replace the 66-year-old Arlene Phillips as a presenter on Strictly Come Dancing with a younger model. "What's the big fuss about her getting sacked, eh? It's show business, Arlene, not ugly business... It's not like she's completely disappearing from TV. Straight after this, she's going to be on live autopsy with Gunther von Hagens, and then she's back on our screens at Christmas being chased by the Ghostbusters."

Several observers have said that search engines are leading men to discover perversions they never knew they had. A generation before they could have got through their lives without ever having the opportunities that the computer age provides to learn they had a compulsive interest in high heels or bestiality.

Similarly, Mock the Week tells me something about the British I would rather not know. It commands an audience of about three million. As I watched, it occurred to me that Britain may well have three million people who would happily go along with the mob if we ever had a government that incited violence against the vulnerable.

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Commentor
September 11th, 2009
12:09 PM
I like how the adjective 'Scotsman' seems to be spat out as a pejorative term.

Red
September 5th, 2009
12:09 AM
My unstructured reactions to Cohen's article: (1) It does me think that slagging off old and unattractive people is a cheap route to a laugh. (2) Frankie Boyle is really funny. I sometimes watch the show and even the lines that Cohen quoted made me laugh (again). (3) If the comedy talent is 'low-grade', what is 'high-grade' comedy? A comedian who can issue barbs against senior politicians? Rory Bremner? Or Armando Ianucci? (4) Why did Cohen mention that Boyle was a 'Scotsman'? Would he have written, "A gaunt, aggressive, slit-eyed Englishman with a neurotic determination to be heard first and always." or "A gaunt, aggressive, slit-eyed Ethiopian with a neurotic determination to be heard first and always." or "A gaunt, aggressive, slit-eyed Jew with a neurotic determination to be heard first and always." or "A gaunt, aggressive, slit-eyed Thai with a neurotic determination to be heard first and always." (5) I think MTW is funny. I watch very little TV and I think that it is a good laugh. Better than IGNFY, or any other comedy show on TV. My only criterion is no. of laughs. The Mighty Boosh are up there too, along with Chewing the Fat. (6) Nick Cohen is awfully solemn.

Anonymous
September 4th, 2009
11:09 AM
@Johnathan Pearce, I don't recall anyone ever being asked, before the invasion of Iraq, whether they supported the overthrow of Saddam Hussein. What actually happened was that we were told that Iraq posed such an overwhelming threat to the security of this nation and others that we had to attack them unless Hussein disarmed. Furthermore, we and Saddam were told that, were he to disarm, then his regime would be safe. The silly notion that the invasion was a 'liberation' was only peddled once it became impossible to deny that Iraq had indeed been defenceless. Our servile media, of which Cohen is an example, fell immediately into step. Cohen supported our attack, in the face of the evidence and so bears his share of responsibility for the ensuring catastrophe. From now on, I'd be glad were he to confine himself to writing witless and pompous critiques of TV programmes. That would cause far less damage.

Rob
September 3rd, 2009
11:09 PM
Nick, I think you are reading far too much into this awful programme. It's simply a programme by yobs for yobs. I don't think it is any more than that. It is simply a reflection on how debased the BBC has become. I watched the "Best of" this mess for about 20 minutes and just got a headache. This is public service broadcasting? Is the BBC sending thousands to prison over non-payment of the TV tax to produce vile rubbish like this?

Emily Molli
September 3rd, 2009
2:09 AM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. That had me in tears. Is this a joke?

Johnathan Pearce
September 2nd, 2009
2:09 PM
Resistor, please explain why a person who supported the overthrow of Mr Hussein's vile Baath regime, as Mr Cohen did, is somehow not therefore entitled, in your view, to comment on a crass TV "comedy" show that appeals to base instincts?

Devil's Kitchen
September 1st, 2009
7:09 PM
I would pick this article apart line by line but, since I assume that the whole thing is a bit of a joke, that would be a waste of my precious time. And what is that last paragraph about, Nick? Are you suggesting that those who have a laugh at the expense of the old and the ugly would, the next minute, be hunting down and killing Jews given half a chance? Although, if by "the vulnerable" you mean "politicians" then I'd happily indulge in violence against them. And, incidentally, if his comments (you know: all of those ones you quite obviously haven't seen) are anything to go by, so would Frankie Boyle. DK

resisitor
August 30th, 2009
4:08 PM
'As I watched, it occurred to me that Britain may well have three million people who would happily go along with the mob if we ever had a government that incited violence against the vulnerable.' I recall Nick Cohen cheered on the bombing and invasion of Iraq, I call that inciting violence against the vulnerable. And it happened.

Ross Burns
August 28th, 2009
2:08 PM
Well, Nick Cohen has finely demolished that programme. One does not have much to wonder of what Alasdair Milne might think of the BBC now, and its managers. For it was he who as Director of Television Programmes at the BBC banned Dennis Potter's Brimstone and Treacle. Mock the Week? Hopefully it'll soon be "Drop the Week" (in telly-world parlance) Ha ha.

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